I always hang on as long as I can to avoid using an airplane’s bathroom, but today nature won and I made the long, awkward trip to the back of the plane.  Now, admittedly, I am not the smallest human on the planet, but there was barely room to get the door shut.  The ceiling came up from the rear towards me at an angle, so there was no room to stand at all.

The whole process was embarrassing and I wondered what had more room; the airplane bathroom or a coffin.  I vote coffin.  I’ve never been in one but I know it looks like the person is fully stretched out instead of ducking their head, bending at the knees, and hunching their back like some kind of ogre, so the coffin definitely looks more spacious to me.

I now officially call B.S. on every “mile high” club story I’ve ever heard about (except the ones about dwarfs, as they may be the only folks that could pull this off, and even then it would be a little tight), but the rest of the stories are lies.